On Valentine’s Day, I unintentionally conducted a happiness experiment. I wore a cute, fuzzy sweater with hearts all over it, and everywhere I went, people smiled at me. They lit up for a moment as they told me how cute it was.
It got me thinking about how little it takes to give others a jolt of happiness. And the joy I felt from these interactions reminded me that this happiness flows both ways.
A fuzzy sweater with hearts is such a small thing, but it created a loop of shared joy—one that stayed with me long after the sweater was back on its shelf.
The moment brought me back to something I had recently learned at a lecture by Dr. Laurie Santos, whose work focuses on the science of happiness. She shared research showing that the positive feelings we get from doing something kind for others tend to last longer than the happiness we feel from receiving kindness ourselves.
In one of the studies she shared, participants were given a small amount of money each day for several days and told to either spend it on themselves or on someone else. Those who spent the money on themselves reported a steady decline in happiness over time, as the experience became familiar and less exciting.
For those who gave the money away, however, the pleasure stayed strong, even after doing the same kind act multiple days in a row. Researchers suggest that this is because giving focuses our attention on others and on meaningful connection rather than on what was gained, making each act feel fresh and rewarding rather than something that's quickly adapted to.
Here's your Ultimate You challenge.
Over the next week, do one small, intentional act of kindness for someone every day.
Hold the door for someone.
Let a car merge.
Compliment someone’s fabulous nails.
You can even generate happiness on days when you don't leave the house. Send a text that says, “I was thinking of you and hope this week is treating you well.”
What we’re really practicing isn’t generosity, it’s awareness. Noticing how connected we all are, and how easy it is to tip the emotional scales toward something lighter, brighter, and happier.
This is why small acts of kindness have a greater impact than we might expect. When happiness lingers, it quietly shapes our future. It can show up later as greater emotional resilience when things don’t go as planned, more patience in our relationships, and a stronger sense of caring and compassion.
Happiness is something we have the power to both generate and share. And the size of the act is irrelevant.
Meaningful shifts in our mood and mindset can come from small acts that remind us how deeply connected we all are, and how important feeling connected is for a fulfilling life. Try it this week and notice how the happy feeling lingers.
In health and happiness,
